I Ordered Water. At A Bar. I Must Have Been Drunk.

Good ole Austin. One big drunk tank. I always enjoy my time in Austin. Food, drinking, more drinking, breakfast tacos. Have I mentioned I love breakfast tacos? Well I do. So Friday was shaping up to be a solid night out. Started at El Arroyo for mexican martinis, because well, they're delicious. Skipped dinner, and by skipped I mean had chips and queso and skipped the whole entree idea. Smart move except for one tiny flaw. I got hammered. I started the night with Kate and Jordan but Kate went off gallivanting, so Jordan and I struck out on our own. Ended up at Key Bar, because we are old now and apparently it is unseemly to be seen on 6th street East of Congress. Who knew? Had a good time until one of the guys turned into quite the douche lord. What makes people think acting that way is charming? I certainly gave off enough bitchy signals to let him know it wasn't working, but I'm not sure if he got it. So sad. 

This is where it gets fuzzy so I will use my trusty blackberry to recap. I ended up dragging the girls to Maggie's (gasp! dirty 6th I know). Said hola to a couple of bartender friends who I will always be fond off because they saved my buttloads of moulah back in my school days. So very lovely to see them. I believe our next episode was a pedi-cab, which personally is just to guilt ridden. i believe I spent the whole time apologizing, then over tipping. Oops. BTW, I still haven't checked the bank statements from this night, too afraid to see the damage. Ok so, I know my last stop was Molotov, where the infamous water was ordered. I can't remember the last I drank water at a bar. Times they are a changing. It was also at Molotov that I remembered I had a key to Kate's place, which I thought was a block away. I was mistaken. As I trot on down 6th street, one block turns into two, two turns into ten. I was barefoot by the time I reached the door. In retrospect, I'm not sure why I didn't call Kate and alert her to plan. As I sit on her bed googling pizza places open after midnight. I hear someone open the door, but no one is there. I assume it is Kate, run and open the door only to find the porch empty. Confusing. Must have been a ghost. About 5 minutes later, I hear someone make a second attempt, This time I run to the door, throw it open, and scare the pants off Kate. Somehow we ended up with pizza, Kate is so supportive in my "eating healthier" routine. Low and behold, "Father of the Bride" was on, so you know I watched that until I fell asleep. 

Water... what a pussy.

Let Us Discuss One Of My Stronger Abilites

I am known, among other things for my ability to remember useless information. Whether it be regarding pop culture or people I met once's birthday, I don't forget silly things. Important things slip my mind, but if it can help me in no way, like a steel trap. I will get calls from people asking me a bit of random information and somehow I even surprise myself by knowing the answer. Just last week I spouted off two guys birthdays, just to prove my randomness. These "guys" were from high school and middle school and hadn't talked to either in over 6 years. So weird.

I have been called pathetic by some. Well excuse me, it it not a choice. I do not actively sit down with a calendar on Friday nights and put to memory all the birthdays. I don not quiz myself. I just know it. And I am far from infallible, I do not claim to be a master at pop culture. There is plenty I don't know. But tonight was one of those nights that proved I know enough.

Kate calls. Kate never calls, wonder what she wants.

Kate: I need to ask you a random pop culture question. But I don't have alot to go on.

Me: Alright, what do you need to know?

Kate: Well my boss looks like someone famous and I can't remember who. I'm going to describe her.

Me: It would help if you knew one thing she was in.

Kate: That's the issue I have no idea so I can't imdb her. All I know is that she has brown hair, a wide smile, and she's not like sexy or anything. She's a normal 90's movie star, kinda plays the b roles. Maybe she was in something with Chandler.

Really, wow, great description there Kathryn. So at this point I think of who could have been in a movie with Matthew Perry, or as Kate says, Chandler. Amanda Peet, not her. Salma Hayek, obviously not. Remember 90's....

Me: What about Neve Campbell (shot in the dark)?

Kate: Let me look her up. No, not her but close. I can't believe you got this close. You're ridiculous. I remember a scene where she was frazzled, maybe smoking a cigarette or something?

Me: (While looking at pictures of Neve), Well what about Parker Posey? 

Kate: Let's see. Oh my god that's her.

Let's see, out of the 3 clues I was given, one wasn't even accurate, Parker Posey and Matthew Perry haven't ever worked together. Somehow though, I found my way to her. Another satisfied customer, another ridiculous conversation. 

P.S. So this has nothing to do with the above situation, but my 11 year old brother just walked in saying something about the dog, and what did I do to her? I have a miniature dachshund named Darcy. She likes to sleep in jackets and blankets, and anything she can wrap herself up in that was left on the floor. I apparently left a north face on the floor. While she was trying to get out of it, she mistook the arm hole for the exit. She was able to get her head and front paws out, but then got stuck. She dragged herself out of my room by her two front paws. She was like an honest to god sausage in a casing. Highlarious. I held the jacket while James held her and I acted like she was a stubborn pillowcase and shook until she came loose. I doubt any of you have ever had that situation come up. 

I Forgot What Sun Looked Like, Thank You For Bringing It Back

This weekend was a good weekend. I didn't leave the T Cove once, not once, from Friday to Monday morning. And yet, I wasn't bored. Some Saturdays, I wake up and can't wait to find something to do. Last weekend that something was drinking, this weekend, running. Doesn't even sound like the same person, I know.

So after work Friday, I saw Valentines Day. It was cute, funny, everything you would expect it to be. Just a solid movie. Plus, there was popcorn, so I was happy. When I got home, it was impromptu movie night with the ladies. About 8 of my moms friends came over for dinner, dessert wine, and 500 Days of Summer. I love oatmeal chocolate chip cookies. Love them. But since everyone of the people there was on one "diet" or another, the plate kept getting pushed from end to end of the table, because people have no self control. Yet somehow, the plate was empty in only a few minutes. Where did the diets go? Needless to say, i was drunk early, watched some Olympics, because I am in fact an American, and then passed out only to awaken to a horrific red wine headache.

Saturday started gross. Gray gray gray. It's been gray for weeks I feel like. Someone up there heard the bitching and the sky opened up. Awesome. I went on a run (on a Saturday?!?) Shocking, I know. What can I say, I'm trying. Sat on the patio for a bit, because, again, it was awesome outside. See for yourself...

Then we went to a neighborhood VDay party. Pink margaritas = greatness, thank you momma. Cindy went and brought her damn cookies, for the second night in a row, so I ate those with some other delectables. Confiscated a bottle of champagne, which was finished by Hallie, Kate and myself. Speaking of Hallie, Congrats on the new house Anne! Movin' on up. So Saturday ended the same way as Friday, drunk and well fed.

Sunday was more of the same. Running, drinking, eating, movie. This time it was "The Invention of Lying". Good movie. When I left for work on Monday, I realized I hadn't ventured out in over 48 hours. Weird how full a weekend can seem when you actually did a whole lotta nothing.

Victorious Yet Again

So, I had a couple of victories this week. Small yet significant. I think we all know how I feel about Lonesome Dove, so I won't go into that, but I will say that it confuses me how someone could not like it. And by confuse I mean 100% don't understand. I know many people who have never read or seen it. That is "fine". I also understand thinking you won't like it for varying reasons (length, it's a western, it was made in '89). But once you have seen it and claim to not like it, then you are just being stubborn. Moving on.

Kate is one of the many people who refused to watch it with me. Too long. But Kate has a weakness. Pralines. So for my first victory, I tackled the sickeningly sweet desert, and voila. A trade was made, 2 hours of LD if I was to make pralines. Only one problem. I have heard pralines are difficult to make. I was afraid, and rightly so, that if I came to the viewing with sub par pralines, her end would not be upheld. With the prospect of a convert on my hands, I was able to pull off some very impressive sugary pecan clusters. They. Were. Good.

Second victory. Lonesome Dove is 4, 1.5 hour parts. Kate was not very optimistic. Honestly I don't think she thought I would follow through, jokes on her. After part one was over, I automatically started part 2. After that we took a break to prep dinner. Part 3 was watched while eating dinner. At around 9:00 we made the decision, "why stop there?". Onto part  4. Seriously. We watched the WHOLE thing. It was awesome. Her mom and sister came in for varying parts. Momma knew the story, but Sally was lost. She happened to come in during one of the more, shall we say, moving moments, and was quite confused as to why I was crying so profusely. Gets me every time. When the show ended, Kate said she loved it, and wanted to go read it right away. It was great. Her words. So, with that as evidence, I implore even you strongest of naysayers to give into what could be some of the best hours of television you ever watch. Ever.

P.S. You'll notice that Tommy Lee Jones, Robert Duvall, and Diane Lane made the top 10 lists. All three were in LD. All three were awesome in it.

A Weekend Totally Dominated by Football, Again

And Baseball too...

It's Monday, and I couldn't be more tired. Friday, I left work a bit early, had some errands to run before I went to The Stros game with one, Michael D. Topping. He was running 3 minutes late, so I of course filled that time by going to the bar and getting a beer. Ran into some friends. I mean, in all of Houston, why can I go into any bar, and see people from Clear Lake, its getting to be ri-god-damn-diculous. So Mike shows, go to the suite, where I tried to act polite, as to not offend his parents who were kind enough to let me join. Watched the Astros play yet another frustrating game. Got enough free beer to fill my quota, and headed home to Boon's. I was meeting Kate. Now, she was coming from a restaurant 7 minutes away. I was coming from Minute Maid, which is 30 minutes away. Who do you think got there first? Pathetic Kathryn, pathetic. Ran into MORE Clear Lake people. Then proceeded to get hammered, hammered drunk.

Saturday, woke up earlier than necessary. Well it was early, but Nancy didn't find it unnecessary. What is it about older people, that sleep pisses them off. I mean, ya, if my friends over sleep and we were supposed to meet up, annoying. If I am minding my own business however, it doesn't bother me to know others are sleeping. Anyways, so I woke up, did some more nothing around the house, went into town to watch the game, blowout, nice. Watched the Tech vs. UH, game, go coogs. Still pretty hungover from Friday, it's like I'm old or something, stupid liver.

Woke up early on Sunday, to my father saying "what time you getting up?" Me: "When are we leaving?". Gregg: "10 Minutes". What the hell, who waits until 10 minutes before the train pulls out. 30 minutes would have been nice. I mean, ya I sleep in, but 8:45 on Sunday, not weird for me to be sleeping. I'm gonna have to figure out this sleep thing. Maybe if I had any time, I could have had a glass of water before we left. As it happened, I didn't have water, so when it got hot as shit at the tailgate, I blacked out. Nice. I know I fell, and I know my dad caught me, otherwise, I'm a little fuzzy. Fantastic. Went into the game. Got a free hat, nice. Watched the Texans embarrass themselves, I mean c'mon, pass interference, I think not.

And again, one Peyton Williams Manning came to my rescue. All day I was down in fantasy football, then number 18 comes and pulls a miracle 49 points. Love, love is in the air.

Kate, And The Reason I Love Her

Now, many people know me well, and many people are able to provide me with birthday gifts that fit me perfectly. My mother for one, made my favorite chocolate cake, with blue bell, yum. But Kate wins. I mean, it is a true friend who goes out of her way, and stops at a hole in the wall pizza place, 2 hours from home, just to bring me pizza rolls. Love, that's what it is.